it's good to feel creative

i'm working on writing poems with the thinking that they'll actually end up as songs. makes you think and write a bit differently in doing that, but it's all good. here's a poem/song that i've written recently about some long ago events/happenings/... stuff.

A young naive girl with not much to her name
Working for a living while her parents did the same
College student in the day and a waitress every night
Struggling to make it, but making out all right

One day while she was working she turned around to see
This guy comin down the stairs bein all that he could be
Before you knew it she was in his car and meeting mom and dad
And maybe this whole marriage thing, wouldn’t be so bad

The gifts soon followed and the bank account grew
Blessed with two kids, but it was then that she knew
No amount of money and no expensive gift
Would ever take the place of the loving that was missed

And it’s just that I don’t
Think I want to be here anymore
I don’t think I want to see you
Anymore
I don’t want hear your keys
In the door
No, I don’t think I want to be here
Anymore

The days and months grew into years
And soon the smiles turned to tears
Trapped inside her fancy home
Inside a life but not her own

The kids would ask ‘where’s daddy’
But daddy’s not at home
She wondered then where SHE was
And why she was alone

And it’s just that I don’t
Think I want to be here anymore
I don’t think I want to see you
Anymore
I don’t want hear your keys
In the door
No, I don’t think I want to be here
Anymore

I refuse to be here
Anymore
I refuse to be ignored when you walk through the door
I will not let you push me and I will not let you scream
It’s time for me to make a move
And live the life I’ve dreamed


And it’s just that I don’t
Think I want to be here anymore
I don’t think I want to see you
Anymore
I don’t want hear your keys
In the door
No, I don’t think I want to be here
Anymore

i was talking recently to a guy i met in SL named Ren. Ren writes for Terra Nova and we were discussing art/politics/people/avatars/emotions, etc. in that conversation it was mentioned that people think that going online and becoming an avatar sometimes makes people think that they're a completely different person and they're leaving their 'real' persona in some other location. that's just not the case. i think everything you do online, somehow, in some way, reflects who you are as a person even if it's dreamy to think that in 'real life' someone might be a very shy, reserved guy and online they can 'transform' into a flirty, extroverted, sexy woman... somewhere, deep inside, those basic values and thoughts are still the same. not that this is a 'newsflash' for anyone, but i think sometimes it's easy to think that our online and offline personas are completely different. they aren't.

i've also met some people that are incredibly focused on keeping their Second Life avatar as close as they possibly can to the 'real' them that it's almost weird. I mean, I completely respect the fact that some people are all about 'keeping it real' and strive to have their avatars look exactly like them. If that's your thing, do it with zeal, man. I even had one of my residents in Mill Pond request an accessible loft apartment because they're physically challenged in real life. that sort of made me stop and think. like i said, if you're all about keeping it real, then bring it. i'm totally ok with people doing what they're passionate about - but it did make me wonder.. why, in a world where you CAN do anything, be anything.. hell, you can FLY here.. why would someone choose to 'ground' themselves to being what they already know, or already are?

I've been reading about gender issues/sexuality/body image as it relates to Second Life and the fact is that yes, it makes a difference. It makes a difference in 'real' life, and in Second Life it's still all 'real' people behind the avatars, so i find it odd that people are shocked that 'even in the virtual world' people may judge you based on appearance. I also think, however, (and this is just based on my personal experience, but hey.. what isn't) that in online communities, you're really judged more by your ability to spell properly and converse intelligently than by your flexi-hair and sexy skin.